رب اغفر لي وارحمني وتب علي
"Ya Tuhanku, ampunilah aku, rahmatilah aku dan aku bertaubat kepadamu."
Rejab has arrived.
Only the closest to me know how sad I feel.
I didnt get the job that I was hoping for.
No matter how well I thought I did for the interview, if its not written in kitab loh Mahfudz that my rizk is not from there, then I wont get it. I was reminded of that by sis Aishah.
I give in to this. And, I give in to the fact that Allah (swt) knows best. He knows whats best for me, yet I dont know. I can only put effort and pray.
Still, this heart was broken upon the rejection, and I am trying to mend it again. I am not as strong as I hoped to be.
Thankfully, there are some servants of God that shared alot of kind words to me. I may not have alot of friends, but I have a couple whose Iman and Yakin are so strong, its amazing.
Ukhti27, your advised have given me new perspective in life to go on with what I have and to improve myself spiritually. I will look at what I have instead of what I dont have.
Sis Nazrana, your jokes and cheerful words brings me happiness and ease some of my worries. To know that you are always there even through sms, is very assuring. I will always be there to cheer you on too. In the end, it is the cleanest heart that wins the true happiness.
Cuz Rei and Tanty, be it on MSN and email, thanks for the chats and logical thinking and just being there to lend a shoulder to cry on.
I love you ladies who make me stronger... my inspiration, each and everyone of you.
Rejab is here. Soon Sya'aban and then Ramadhan. These blessed months...hopefully will bring much blessings to me and my family and to all those who seeks Allah's(swt) blessings.
I halt activities here and will concentrate on some spiritual journey. I hope you do too. To my friend who lost her spiritual self, I hope these months heal your wounds and pull you back to our creator and our Rasul (saw) once again.
To myself, whose heart have been crying silently daily... I pray that after all the sadness, there will be happiness.
Till then...Ummi hearts u.