I begin with - Al fateha

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Abang ( 2 years 8 months )






As I layed my head to rest on the sejadah,
my eyes shut, tears flowing, as I recalled my nightmarish experience of the day.
I sujud to GOD for some time, weeping to him, then I gave salaams and seek his forgiveness for I felt very much like a failure.
.
Sometimes, when Abang Misbehaves in public, and I cannot control his activeness and stubbornness,
I feel lost, and ashamed.
.
I dont know why... Sometimes, when he is too excited,
He misbehaves and even my scolding or beating him does not work.
So I have to remove him from where he is misbehaving.
Adik, my little angel, just have to go along with us.
.
Sometimes, when we are out shopping, we have to go back as soon as we bought the things we need, cos Abang is simply not behaving well.
Sometimes when we are at the mosque for Isyak prayers, we have to jump into the car and drive off as soon as prayers are over cos Abang is well, running around the mosque, laughing loudly, as if, its his house.
Yes, kids will be kids, but sometimes, the place to be kids is just not appropriate.
I have self banned him and myself from our normal mosque, until he learns to behave himself when he is in it.
.
I am waiting for the day, where he will learn to behave himself when he is outside.
Sometimes, I feel so frustrated of Abang's misbehaving, that I cry when I lecture him.
He does not understands...
cos he will tell me " Abang, good boy..."

11 comments:

Hajar said...

Assalamualaikum sis,

It's not easy to have kids. Although I have none to call my own, I have taken care of some and sure, they can really drive you up the wall. I'm sure you're doing the best that you can to bring him up under your protective shield, and Allah S.W.T knows it well. May Allah S.W.T make it easy for the both of you.

Adikbongsu said...

Salam 'alaik

Children are test for us ... when they misbehave take it that Allah is testing us ... I have three and all are very very active even the eldest who is going thru her teenage stage ... ahh that one the test is worst :(

When they are young the worries are such and such but when they grow older ... ishhh I am more afraid that when they misbehave when they are young ...

hope u understand what I'm saying ..hehee

Anonymous said...

alalala. last part sure cair kan!

anyway, Assalam Ummi. senakal-nakal dia pon, he's still very adorable tau. maybe it's in the genes to be active. hehe. i personally can't wait to meet Adik when she's older cos i'm sure there's lots to say to me like that day. you take care okie!

Azizzah.

Anonymous said...

i guess boys are very different from gals.. like mine. I find it so easy with my gal alhamdulillah but with my boy it seems like instructions just fly past him though i am very certain he understands what i am saying tapi alhamdulillah both my kids are quite scared of their dad mainly because he doesnt get angry that often so when he does get angry i guess they get a bit taken aback and listen to him. Maybe give your boy a bit more time . Insya'Allah when he is older he will get better.
-id-

Anonymous said...

As parents you must know when and how to take actions. Putting hands on the child and screaming at their ears are not the best ways to discipline our children but sometimes, we have to do it.

Just an idea, I create a punishment corner using a round carpet in my house for my kids whenever they are naughty. Each time they misbehave, they will sit on the carpet until they beg me not to be so rowdy anymore.

Anonymous said...

Salam Ummi
As much as we all can say it is normal for them to behave at such age...it is painful at most times to be just angry at them...but do not feel short changed though..it is a test and more tests are coming up but insya'Allah manageable..most moms go thru things with their kids too and also in their different sets of problems..not now maybe later...not that am praying for any problems but ..yeah..we all do go thru things you know...This is a phase that will pass Ummi..hang in there ok..maybe talk to him how you expect him to behave when outside before leaving the house..and what he will expect from you if he didnt behave and reward him when he actually does end of the day.Taking away privileges is a good idea too.

You are not alone Ummi..maintain the patience and make lotsa doas..hugs*

akak

Ummi's Blog said...

Salaams,

Hajar: yes Hajar, its not easy unless u have girls! haha..I guess every kid is a test..of patience...Amiin to your doa.

Kak Banun : yes, kak..I faham..every stage of their lives, there will be some sort of test and problems kan... just that we must know how to overcome it with wisdom and patience...I didnt know girls can misbehave too..haha...dun want to be bias, tapi I see boys are just so much harder to handle than girls.

Azizah : yes he is super adorable, tapi bila dah nakal..masya'allah..hanya tuhan yang tahu how much me and Abang H have to sabar. Tat day after u left at the airport, he played with the trolly, and the trolly hit him causing a huge benjol at his forhead! Melalak kawan kita tu.

Id: Its good that your kids are scared of your hub, at least someone to control them when they get a little overboard.
For me, my son seems so daring....maybe we have pampered him a little too much. Now i treatened him with a belt, of cos, I dont use it unless absolute necessary..tapi tak kan nak bawak belt when we are outside kan...

Anonymous: The sit one corner does not seems to work with my 2 year old son yet, but will sure try and implement him when he understands better.
sometimes I need to have time out with him as well.

Akak : mulut I berbuih advising him about how he should behave outside before we leave the house, tapi macam he tak listen lah..he is so excited when he is outside, he forgets I think..
yes, I know this phase will pass. I always joke with my hubby, Im waiting for the day, I can talk to my mature and disipline son how naughty he was when he was a kid..hehe...Insya'allah eh..

ummu nabil said...

*puts hand in chin*

Salaam babe...

I think somewhere in one of my previous post in my blog I did declare that I sometimes forget that my toddler is a toddler. True, they may be bright, smart and are as absorbent as sponges, but they're still are toddlers/pre-schoolers, with limited understanding and limited expressions; there are things that they have yet to understand, like 'proper/appropriate' behaviour for certain places. Yet, even the Prophet s.a.w dotes on his grandsons. Wasn't there an instance when on of baginda's grandsons rode on his shoulders while he was performing sujud? ;) Did Rasulullah scold his grandson? I doubt it. (Tapi rata-rata orang zaman skarang jauh dari sifat keihsanan Rasulullah. LOL.)

My point is, there is a time and age for everything. Right now, life as we knew it - with the routines etc before the kid/s came - will have to be adjusted; some things that we used to do, even (sunat) things that will garner you extra pahala, may have to take a back seat for a while (and I'm sure Allah understands!). I'm sure you will miss doing such things sorely, but flexibility will give you less headaches and make your kids happier.

Take it easy, hor?

Ummi's Blog said...

Thanks Ummu Nabil for the reminder. Yet again, I thank Allah for having you as my friend.
*hugs*...geez Im v emotional tonite lehz...

ummu nabil said...

Babe, kita sama-sama tgh mendayung sampan usang. Ehehehe.. Sama-sama lah kita saling menasihatkan satu sama lain ye :) Let's lean on each other and cheer each other on, even if it's through text messages & blog comments!

*waves pom-poms*

Ummi's Blog said...

yes v true! though it looks like a tough hill to climb, we'll get up there somehow thru perseverence...

*cheers and pom pom and cartwill n backflips* ( eh over pulak aku ni! ) : )