The future...

Started of my day feeling really happy, even kissed hubby twice in the car !

7th month check up went fine. Water level is good, Dr Heng is happy that we are on the right track.
Alhamdullilah. So far, no heartburn since Ive hit 28 weeks, just feeling a little heavy when I walk. Starting to walk like a panguin. Still refusing to remove my wedding rings from my soon-to-be bloated fingers. It was not too difficult to part with them during my first pregnancy though. Dont tell me this baby is vain ! hur hur....

We managed to visit Azizah and family yesterday night at their “eunos condo” … That flat really like condo lah. Alhamdullilah. Little Habib was cute and hugged her. Phew, he was in his happy mood.

All of the sudden, I think of Little Habib’s future. His school....the school bus....lesser time with him....separate beds .....
Can my parents can cope with looking after him and his adik?
Would I ever have to resort to taking a maid or worse put him in child care ? ( I don’t know why I am so afraid of these 2 words ).

Would I ever have to be a housewife and lose my financial freedom to look after my kids? ( gasp! another scary thought since we are facing another great depression here )
The financial crisis has spread to Europe, and our minister have braised us to face tough times. Time to thightened our belts.
I wonder how we are going to cope with 2nd baby on the way. People say babies brings Rizk, especially baby girls.

And I also think alot about my children's iman. Will they grow up to be good muslims ?
So far, hubby and me are doing alot to introduce solat and the quran in Little Habib's life. We have exposed him to the mosque and majlis maulids and qashidahs eversince he was in my tummy. Little Habib started going to the mosque when he was 4 months old. I still remember bringing him to Masjid Ansar and he layed on the carpet, and Ustaz Hasan Saifouridzal carried him after leading the solat Isyak. You know things like that....
Still, a muslim brother questioned me if I can ever be sure that my children can be people who are on the straight path when they grow up.
Scary! cos I can never be sure.

I took this from Ustaz Yusri's ( Abah Yasir ) blog. Very good entry I find. Noticed, Solat is mentioned in every stage of our children growing up years.

4. Bila isteri dah hamil, kedua suami dan isteri:
- Solat jgn tinggal!
- Baca Zikir/Quran. Sekarang ni ibu2 sibuk nak anak tahu membaca semasa umur masih kecil lagi (2-3 tahun) sehinggakan masa usia 3-4 bulan kandungan, kita dah ajar dia membaca. Kenapa tidak kita banyakkan baca Quran juga? Pasti, impaknya lagi power kan pada anak dalam kandungan? Bila umur 3 tahun mesti dah pandai baca Quran punya! (Saya kena cuba dulu ni!)
5. Bila dah bersalin:
- Solat jangan tinggal lagi! Bukan apa, nilah satu pembudayaan. Jadi anak kita membesar dengan nampak kita bersolat berseorangan atau sama suami/isteri. Mesti dia confuse punya, bila tiap kali solat, eh apasal mak bapak aku bo layan ni?
6. Bila dah besar 3-7 tahun.
- Solat jangan tinggal jugak! Latihlah dia, bertahap-tahap. Mungkin bila dah 5 tahun satu hari satu waktu solat. Tak konsisten pun takpe. 6 tahun 2 waktu, 7 tahun 3 waktu. 8 tahun 4 waktu, 9 tahun 5 waktu. 10 tahun, tak solat baru rotan : )

And so … my happy mood has dwindled to be emotional again and I wish I can cry it out to my hubby whose getting busier with his job now that his senior have assigned him harder task.

Nevermind, I will go to the mosque for zohor prayers later and cry to Allah (swt) my other confidante.

Oh yes, I miss mum too. I so miss her, I so miss the attention I get from her when I was younger and husband-less. I miss our outings and chats. She doesnt know this, I suppose cos I don’t show it to her. She thinks Im so engrossed with my own family that Ive forgotten her. Actually I think about my mum everyday.

Thinking of visiting maqam Habib Nuh this Saturday. I need to seek some solace. I need to visit the Alims. I need to be close to Allah (swt).