I begin with - Al fateha

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Time is passing by....

Another week to go before I officially start my leave and there is a high probability I may not be coming back to this office anymore.

This morning, I walked pass Change Alley and Clifford Centre and I looked around at the place where I have been spending my weekdays.

I saw Starbucks and Spinellis and Body Shop and Charles and Keith, shops which I am farmiliar with.

It’s been 1 year of wonderful memories working with this company. What can I say, I had it all…. Good colleagues, was able to wear my headscarf, lunch time was flexible, I could walk to the nearby mosque to do my prayers, Bosses were understanding, my close friend was my immediate supervisor, no one breathing down my neck etc etc…. the best part was I could leave work at 6pm on the dot!

Well, sometimes the saying all good things must come to an end is true after all... As much as I would like to hang on to it and think that this is a nightmare, I have to face reality that there are things that are beyong my control.

Just like this job, my pregnancy will also come to an end soon. It might be my last pregnancy from the way I look at things. Hubby was never in favor of a second child anyway.

I am not so sure if I will miss being pregnant as this hasn’t been exactly a smooth ride for me.
I can’t stand looking at my maternity clothes. I miss my normal clothes and my normal pants and skirts.
I won’t miss the migraines and the hip aches and the leg cramps and the heartburn for sure.

One thing I liked about being pregnant is how I noticed men give you more respect when you are pregnant. Most days, when I walk in the mosque for my zohr prayers, the working men I meet would give me a nod and a smile as if they solute me for walking with a big tummy. Never told my hubby about this before, but I wonder if telling him this would make him appreciate me more for the fact that I am carrying his baby. Not an easy tasks this baby.

I am excited to meet little Adik. Yes I am.
I love Adik so much…see the maternal instinct has kicked in.
Will Adik look like me? Will Adik have thick hair like mine?
Will Adik have dimples like Dadima?
Will Adik have a sweet smile like mine? (Haha...tak malu) …..

These are the things I like to think about. Well, Insha’Allah soon I will know.

Everyday I make supplications that Adik turns out to be a good daughter,with strong Iman, preety on the inside and outside and will bring much happiness and blessings to my family.

Little Habib too is anticipating. See, we’ve trained him well.
He now takes the rattles that I bought for his Adik and he puts the rattles on my tummy. Then he said “Adik, we share toys ok?”… Masya’Allah! This boy is really Masya’Allah!

Actually, when I look at me losing my job and the timing, it may not have been so bad. I have already bought all my baby items.
The pram, Medela pump, sterilizers, milk warmer, clothes, bottles, towel, blankets, minyak telons, baby socks and shoes and my button-in-front pajamas.

Can you imagine if I found out a few months earlier that I would lose my job? I would surely not be able to spend my $$ in peace right. I would have to hold back on my spending thus taking the joy away for shopping for the baby.
The only thing we have not bought is a bassinet, to rock the baby in, but I guess, we can do without that.

Have notified Kak Maryam the 'tukang urut' that *d day* may actually be 12 Dec so standby for urut on the 15Dec..maybe I will just have urut sessions for 7 days instead of 10. I did save up $500 for 10sessions but now, maybe just 7 urut sessions will do.

Till then, baby is moving well, rather active I must say. Hope the baby is not another night owl!

Just have to pray the breast milk starts producing again. Yes, with all the stress and sadness that I am facing now, the milk just seems to all go away suddenly. Subahan’allah…..


Anonymous said...

Assalamu'alaikum wr. wb.,

Dear Ummu Lil Habib,

Focus on the days ahead. Insya Allah, with dua, effort and tawakkal, things will go smooth for you and family. Do with necessities only, ok?

For now, be contented, keep smiling.

Ummu Mukhtaar

Anonymous said...

Oh dear, I think i'd better listen to my husband he's not keen to have our 2nd child too..but I am...looking at your predicament. I will forgo having another child..

I was thinking of becoming a full time mum but thinking of the new global economy uncertainties and my husband no iron rice bowl...i rather be safe than SORRY!

I'm learning from other ppl mistakes...thks Sis.

nor said...

salaam Ummi,

I can relate to this, my hubby wasnt keen on the 2nd child too. But when he saw my lil' angel was born, masya allah, i couldnt describe the joy on his face. But like you, losing yr job..i faced BIG challenges too after my 2nd child was born...(to cut the long story short) somehow, we managed to pull tru dat tough period..Alhamdulillah.

Janna said...

Salam Ummi,

yes, indeed times are bad eh..takpe tawakkal k? easier said than done because i'm facing abt the same..the diff is i'm not (yet) preg for 2nd one! hehe..

and i'm sure the lil princess will be as pretty and intelligent as the ummi!

Ummi's Blog said...


Ummu Mukhtaar : Yes that is my plan. At the moment, Doa, after birth, effort - send out resumes and lastly of course Tawakkal as its all in Allah's hands. Its painful but yes, I am trying to forgo most luxuries and do with only what I need. This is indeed humbling. *smile*

Anonymous : Afwan, I dont think I made a mistake by wanting a second child. I knew we can do it, with patience and endurance. After all, Its all in Allah's hands. I would never have gotten pregnant with the second child without Allah's permission right..so Now I will look at things positively. All the hardship that I had to go thru for this pregnancy was a Test for me. If Allah loves us, he WILL test us right... : )
of cos, yes, please do listen to your husband..Insya'allah you will be rewarded.
As for Full Time House Wife...to each its own...look at your own family situation. No one is right or wrong in this matter...
: )

Sis Nor : Kak thanks for the encouragement. Knowing you had gone thru something like this gives me strength... Hopefully once my hubby sees our daughter, he will redha that nw he has 2 kids and thats how its gonna be! : )

Janna : oh janna...we macam in the same boat eh..Yes times are bad..as long as we can help our hubbys, we shall do that. Do solat hajat in the middle of the night and see HIS help.
May we be blessed for our efforts and may Allah make things easy for us... Kisses for Little Tuchik.

Anonymous said...

Salaam Sis

Orang-orang tua cakap anak membawa rezki...dont discount that. One never knows what might be round the corner for you. I have 3 myself and we dont spent on luxuries but basic necessities. Haha..when I shop I have to keep asking myself is this a want or a need? Dont worry, the joys of having kids around you surpass all the material needs