Alhamdullilah, we have reach the year 1429 according to our Islamic Calender.
We spentd the last moments of 1428H and welcoming the new year at Masjid Khalid. I always joked that my hubby and his friends will play Dam there. Well they do, they all look forward to Allaudin's Briyani Dam everytime its Masjlis Israk Mikraj, Nisfu Sya'abaan and Majlis Maal Hijrah. I would rather go to other mosques, where at least I can see farmiliar faces, but hubby usually insist that I go there too, so that I can enjoy the Briyani.
( Why do I have a feeling Little Habib will grow up with that ideology too? " Beribadah sambil menikmati Briyani Dam kind of attitude. " )
By the time we reached the mosque at 6.30pm, it was packed. Alhamdullilah, I still managed to get a spot inside to solah.
The jemaah read tahlil. Around 7pm, together with Hj Tahir the imam, we read the doa Akhir Tahun 3 times, asking Allah ( swt ) to forgive our pass year's sins and that we seek blessings and we repent. The air in the masjid was so "holy"... Masya'allah. We continued with Magrib prayers and then read the doa Awal Tahun 3 times.
The masjlis continued with a syarahan by an ustaz, a student of Habib Abbas.
Ustaz started off by saying whatever amalan we do must be Ikhlas. Only then will it be accepted by Allah ( swt ).
Then he mentions that Hijrah means to move, berpindah from Mecca to Medinah. Not that Rasullulah (swt) was scared. Remember, at gua Hiraq, Rasullulah told Saidinah Abu Bakar (r.a)... " Dont be scared. Dont be sad. Allah is with us ".
Then somehow the ustaz change the topic to " How to bring up our children to be good muslims in today's society. " ...
It was then I understood why I landed in Masjid Khalid rather than the other masjid. It was most probably because Allah ( swt ) wanted me to listen and apply it on my son.
When Ustaz spoke on and on, tears just stain my cheeks silently. I really dont know if I can guide Little Habib to have the qualities that our prophet (saw) possesed.
It was then I know, that parenting is not all about birthday parties with a theme.
It was not about buying your kids the best toys.
It was about how do u lead him to be a righteous Muslim. Sometimes... I get "Parenting" all mixed up.
Earlier in the day, I had stumbled on a blog which showed somebody's kid having a grand birthday party with a theme and I wondered sadly if me and hubby are the most boring people when we celebrated our baby's 1 year birthday with a doa selamat and even where there were 2 cakes, we did not have a candle blowing ceremony due to our own reasons.
I guess the answer is within me. Let me live the way I want and let them live the way they want and I just pray that Im not affected especially when it comes to bringing up our children... ( hmm make sense ? )
Back to what Ustaz said ....
* Parents are like Architecs. Parents are the ones to plan and mould the child's character.
* Parenting starts from the day a couple becomes husband and wife, the night they consumate, before that, the couple must read the doa before "jumping in the act", so that if it results in the wife getting pregnant, at least we know Setan was not involve in the making of the child.
* Give the child Ilmu from the time they are born. Rasullulah ( saw ) said "carilah ilmu dari buayan hingga ke liang lahat ". We must teach our children to put the ilmu in their hearts. Ilmu is Nur. Dont put it on their heads. Their sarbans will get bigger and bigger and they will be big headed. They will fall as its too heavy. Put it in their hearts.
* Dont teach our children to lie. Sometimes we do it unaware. Eg, when the child is crying, we say "eh look aeroplane aeroplane." When the child look, we say "aiyah aeroplane dah go away." Just to stop the child from crying. But indirectly, we are teaching our child to lie. ( oops Im guilty of that...I always say " look cat cat.." to distract him .. but actually no cat ! ... oops )
* Teach our child Ilmu Tauhid. Tauhid is knowing Allah ( swt ). When they know Allah ( swt ), their aqidah will be strong. When we go to the beach, dont just play and not take any lessons from it. Tell our child, " look at the fishes, they live in the sea for many years, but still their flesh are not salty. Y ? Its the power of Allah ( swt )...."
* After our child is 21, we must learn to let go of our sons. Let them go in search of Ilmu in Alazhar, or Tareem. Dont hold on to them. ( hmm... still dont know if I can do this when the time comes .. insya'allah )
* Teach our child the values of Rasullulah ( saw ). Rasullulah (saw ) always look at the people below him. He always help the poor. Rasullulah (saw) never think of himself. Even on his deathbed, he was muttering " ummati..ummati.. ummati... " He thinks of his people. In the Tahiyat, Rasullulah says " Salaams atas hamba2 yang soleh " ....
* Ustaz says as parents, we should not compeate with other parents. Dont compeate. Compeating, ending up in rivalry are only the signs of Kiamat.
* Ustaz says Remember, we are all slaves of Allah ( swt ). " Ingatlah, aku lah hamba Allah yang paling hina. " ..
When we have that thinking, Insy'Allah, our hearts will be clean and we can be good people.
Salaams Muharram !